The Begining

I started my first blog as a divorce journal.  It was a place to put the feelings that I didn't want to find a home inside me.  I carefully let the cancerous things flow from my heart and into my fingertips, leaving them on the pages for others to read.  There they were supposed to stay, but they didn't.  They just festered there and ate at the page, waiting for the opportunity to flow back through my fingers into their origination.  Here they survived and hid until they found a trigger that caused them to force my hopefulness in to submission.  My mind battles a depression every morning and I know I need to take the time to ask a professional for help, but there is still some kind of stigma that won't let me make that call.

Like most modern women, I am a combination of many things.  I am first and foremost a mother and this trumps all other things that I am.  I have proven that no sacrifice is too great for my children.  I have not failed in conveying their importance in my world.  They know their needs, comforts and wants are and will always be my very first thought.  I am a teacher and through that role a provider for my children.  I am a nature lover,a Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints member.  I am a divorcee, a  fast horse lover, a runner, and a new wife/ stepmom.  I probably put all of those in the order of what I am best at.  I am sure in the journey through this blog I will get to all of those things.